Thirty days of sex

Linking to without comment, except to say to my elders who read my blog, If you want to put this on the Session agenda next month, knock yourself out.

UPDATE:  I can't help myself.  I must comment!  Although Mrs. Avdat has already put me on notice.

I went to the church's website, a congregation named (apparently without a trace of irony) Relevant Church.  People are not having enough sex, they flatly assert.  And couples are divorcing as a result. 

Au contraire, married people are having more sex than you'd imagine, and single people, less than you'd imagine.  Which makes complete sense, if for no other reason than "availability."  So this might be a solution in search of a problem.  Fer sure, Kip would disagree, but I have a suspicion that Kip and Joan's marriage, while hysterically stereotypical, is far from typical.

I do admit it's an intriguing idea.  It turns Lenten discipline on its head.  Indulge, don't renounce.  (Although the church does invite singles to abstain from sex for a month). 

And to tell the truth, saying that a great sex life takes "focus, determination and planning" tracks with what I tell couples in premarital counseling.  Again, contrary to pop culture stereotype, sex is rarely the result of a spontaneous fit of passion.  You do have to make time for it.

Why then am I not on board with this?  There's a fine line between addressing gender differences and engaging in gender stereotyping.  A promise to review "the obvious needs of him and the hidden needs of her" feels like it's crossing the line.  Not every marriage can be saved by the Preacher telling her, "You need to put out more," and telling him, "You need to unload the dishwasher more."  No sex may be a symptom, not a cause, of a troubled marriage.

It's terribly gimmicky, and flatfooted mainliners like myself are prone to grouse.  But if there's sound medical, biblical, theological and psychological teaching behind the gimmick, then fine.  Trouble is, I can't tell from this vantage point, from outside the tent, so to speak.

Comments

[Jennifer]

The song "Business Time" from Flight of the Conchords is in my head as I'm reading your entry.

Other than that I have no comment either.